Whole New Ball Game

David Beckham capped his Real Madrid career with a league title.

Beckham, 32, has been at Real for four seasons but the 3-1 win over Mallorca sealed a first major Spanish honour for the United States-bound star.

A brace from Jose Antonio Reyes, on loan from Arsenal, and an Angelos Basinas own goal clinched Real’s crown.

It is the club’s first La Liga success in four years and they edged out Barcelona, who beat Gimnastic 5-1, because of their head-to-head record.

Beckham, who is set to join LA Galaxy, was not on the pitch at the final whistle having been replaced by Reyes, but he joined the raucous celebrations at the Bernabeu.

“I couldn’t have dreamt it any better,” said Beckham.

“It’s been about winning the title for the last six months - and we’ve deserved it tonight.

“It’s been an incredible experience, but all I remember now is the great things. Winning this tonight now puts to bed everything else.”

BBC Sport report Beckham has arguably been the most influential player for Real Madrid in their quest for their first title in four years

The England star was joined by his three sons on the pitch and was given an emotional send-off.

Apologies for the lack of work on show.
If we’re honest with you the office went to see The Go! Team and we’re suffering like Sebestian Diesler in a dark room.
Ouch.
John Terry’s wedding tomorrow. We’ll be watching him walk flat-footed up the aisle.
See you at the weekend. Honest.

Toulouse forward Trevor Brennan’s life ban from playing rugby has been reduced to a five-year suspension.

In March, the European Rugby Cup (ERC) found Brennan guilty of assaulting an Ulster fan at a Heineken Cup game and he was handed the life ban.

However an independent appeals panel has ruled that the initial maximum penalty was “disproportionate”.

Brennan’s ban from participating in future ERC tournaments has also been reduced to a five-year suspension.

BBC Sport report both bans will be deemed to have started on 1 June 2007.

But in the big fella’s defence the fan had just called his mother a whore.

Well, have you seen her? A slag yes, but a whore?

Full-time footballer and part-time boxer Joey Barton will be beating up team-mates in the north-east.

The most over-rated midfielder of his generation will be taking his I’m-one-of-the-best-players-in-England delusion grand tour to Newcastle who don’t seem to mind that he isn’t very good.

Then again the Magpies did sign Bellamy, Bramble, Moore, Carr…….

What more do you want? That’s pretty much it.

Oh, the squad…here it is then.

Lazy sods. The things we do for you [like copy and paste the squad from the second Test].

Michael Vaughan (capt), Alastair Cook, Andrew Strauss, Kevin Pietersen, Paul Collingwood, Ian Bell, Matt Prior (wkt), Liam Plunkett, Steve Harmison, Ryan Sidebottom, Monty Panesar.

[engage Super League; Twickenham Stoop Stadium:
Harlequins (8) 18 - (4) 8 Wigan]

Quins further upset the odds in Super League by taking the prized scalp of Wigan Warriors.

In fact, this was Quins fourth victory in five games of egg-chasing.

They are now level with Wigan in joint fourth place with 16 points. St Helens are top.

Fancy.

[Second Test; Loftus Versfeld, Pretoria:
South Africa (17) 55 - (19) 22 England]

Brian Ashton’s England were on the end of another hiding from the South Africans as more pressure was heaped upon the coach.

Despite a spirited display and a half-time lead the tourists were unable to live with the home side after the break.

Still, at least the Welsh lost again, eh?

[International, Wembley:
England (Terry 68) 1 - 1 Brazil (Diego 90)]

A stoppage-time header from Diego denied the return of David Beckham a fairytale ending.

The Werder Bremen playmaker beat England ‘keeper Paul Robinson deep into time added-on to cancel out John Terry’s header, assisted by Beckham.

But to fair this was the very least Brazil deserved.

They were the better side and kept the ball far, far better than Steve McClaren’s long ball merchants.

On the plus side Reading’s Nicky Shorey made a solid debut at left-back and Michael Owen was a welcome addition up front.

Estonia next on Wednesday…bugger.

When most of the team has got the serious sh*ts, the last thing you want is the rest of the team to suffer…right?

Wrong. Step forward England.

They were laid low by a virus, then laid to rest by a rampant South Africa and now the remainder of the squad have been laid out by the same virus.

God knows who Brian Ashton is going to call up. Actually, God may be the only thing capable of turning this disastrous tour around.

Just between you and us…a few of the WNBG team have had their sports bags and passports ready since the weekend.

You never know…

[Championship Promotion Final, Wembley:
Derby County 1 - 0 West Bromwich Albion - Derby promoted to the Premier League]

Billy Davies’ Derby County will be getting thrashed by the top teams in the land after they won a thrilling play-off final at Wembley.

The win means Derby will return to the Premier League after a five year absence and with it a £60m windfall.

The winning goal was scored by Stephen Pearson, who was signed in January from Celtic, and it settled a pulsating tie.

West Brom were many, and our, favourites to win but Derby proved to be up for the challenge and deserved the victory.

Remembering that Derby finished just a place and two points off automatic promotion in the regular season this proved to be a just result.

They will get dicked next season though.